How to deal with your parents separating

On November 12, 2018, my parents sat my sister and me down and told us they were getting a divorce. This was very difficult to hear, but I did not cry, nor did I  beg them to stay together. In fact, when they told me, I simply said, “Okay.” I still, to this day, cannot describe how I felt in that moment. Two months into their separation, I began to feel really alone and started to isolate myself from my friends and family. I wasn’t participating as much in school as I was before I began to stop caring about school which affected my grades and GPA. During this time I was also a victim of bullying, which caused my self esteem to go down drastically. I was becoming something that wasn’t me. I remembered looking into the mirror one day and not recognizing the person who was staring back. I realized in that moment that I needed to stop running away from the pain my parent’s divorce caused me. 

This led me to not only admit to my parents how I was feeling, but also to myself. Taking this step slowly helped me build myself back up. I even asked my mom if I could talk to a psychiatrist about how I was feeling. After a year with my psychiatrist, I learned how to solve problems I might face at home or school. I also learned how to not keep my emotions pinned up inside and to tell someone how I feel once in a while. I began to learn more of these skills throughout the year and started to put them into use. I started to hang out with my friends more often because I was no longer feeling depressed and angry all the time. I started participating in school again, which improved my GPA. I started to spend more time with my family too. This caused my self esteem to grow a tremendous amount, which then led me to be able to advocate for myself more. Once I started to do this I was able to tell the group of people who were bullying me that I was no longer going to be a victim of their insecurities. The main thing that motivated me through that time of my life was that I couldn’t lose myself. I know that I am important to society and to the world. Even when it seemed like I wanted to give up, I just needed to remember that I was worth fighting for and that I had people around me who care and loved me for me. So, in conclusion I want those who are going or went through the same thing I went through. To remember that it’s okay to feel sad and angry and that you shouldn’t hide those feelings for anyone’s benefits. However, don’t also let those feelings be shown without talking about them too. The more you talk about what’s bothering you the better it gets.

Keenyah Davis – The Latin School – DMSF