A Letter to My Future Self

Dear, Yaretzy

  As a 14 year old I view the world as a place that is so beautiful, but yet again so hurtful. I personally believe that the earth has feelings like anyone else. I also believe that right now the world is just really hurt by how it has been treated for all these years. I feel really connected to it because we are human beings that have been hurt for a long time. I remember when we were just 6 years old and debating why everyone we love leaves us. I never truly understood why I am on this earth, but I hope that you have found why we are here on this earth by the time you read this.

    I hope you have healed yourself by then. I know life is so challenging but all we have gone through is so much bigger than all these little things in life. There are times where I want to give up and just tell everyone I can’t but I know I can. We both know life is not easy at all, but we try to make the best of it. I hope you are truly happy because we never really were happy. I also really hope you are more open and not shy anymore. I hate getting red when a teacher asks me to share out and I hope we changed and became more confident in who we are.

  I wonder if by the time you read this you are still sleeping with your baby blanket because we both know it truly is hard to get rid of that blanket of ours. We cannot sleep without it even till this day, but we both know that our blanket isn’t going anywhere! That blanket has helped us through everything. It makes our anxiety better. I love how we don’t view it as an item but as a person. I also hope you found someone who you feel comfortable with and who loves you because I am still scared that we’ll end up alone even though we both know our mom will always tell us “It’s better to be alone with freedom than with someone and get no freedom.” By the way, Do we still argue with Aiden? How is he? Did you keep your promise in making sure you show him how much you actually care for him? I currently haven’t. He can be a headache sometimes and we both know it. How’s Ailani? Is she doing well? How about Mom did she reach the goals she had?

   Finally I would love to ask you, Did you work hard? Did you give up? Did you accomplish the goals you have? Are you studying to be a Doctor yet? Another really important question, Did you get into Harvard? I hope you did, It’s been our dream since we were kids. I hope life is much better by the time you read this. I hope you finally cut off our father because he doesn’t deserve us. We both know we are much better without him. I hope you still have the same pride and stubbornness as we always did. Keep fighting for what you want and who you are! Never give up. I believe in you, you got this! I bet life is challenging, but like always you did it and overcame the challenge not just for yourself but for your family. Remember they need you just like you need them. Also take good care of your curls, they really are the charm! Try not to think negative because you are positive. Remember to keep your promises and be the person who you truly are.

  Some advice I would love to give you is to just continue to push forward. You are so much more powerful than you believe. You have been through so much to just give up. Do not let anyone destroy what you have built. I am sure you have stayed up plenty of nights to work hard and to demonstrate who you are. All your hard work will eventually pay up. I know you don’t feel important sometimes, but trust me. People acknowledge your hard work. I remember that when we had just turned 14 people wanted to control what we did with our lives and where you would continue your education at. Of course you decided to go somewhere that would be worth your hard work. Although you wanted to go to Ignatius, you still decided that St.Laurence is a better fit for you. I still remember finding out we were not accepted at Ignatius; you felt very upset at yourself. You felt like a failure. But once you asked for a second chance you realized you didn’t want to be somewhere where you weren’t accepted in the first place. You then found out you got accepted to St.Laurence and felt as if the universe gave you a sign and basically said “You are a viking.” I still remember when we got accepted to St.Laurence, Our mom was acting suspicious and we were hanging out with our friends. We were eating pizza and then out of a sudden our mom told us to go upstairs because our grandpa wanted to tell us something. We then saw a letter that was awaiting us, So we opened the letter and there it was. We had gotten accepted to St.Laurence. Although right now I am not sure of where I am supposed to be at, I am still thankful of St.Laurence picking me.

  I know you struggle with your feelings, but I promise we got this. Like I said before I hope you got into an Ivy college. I also hope you are still into music by then. I also hope you live life with no regrets. I am currently struggling with opening up my feelings, but I am sure you know how that went. I hope it was good though. Anyways, I truly wish you the best. You got this. 

Sincerely,

Yaretzy Garcia 

P.S TAKE CARE OF YOUR HAIR VERY WELL .

Yaretzy Garcia – St. Laurence High School – DMSF Class of 2026

Image: Rando Croquis